A year on the list

This was one of our family photos for our dossier.

Last year, on October 27, Peter and I were giddy with excitement to finally be "on the list." I posted that we were going to enjoy that feeling, because it wouldn't be nearly as exciting 12 months later -- and I was right. Here we are, in the same position on the list that we were in June -- frustrating!

Truly, adoption is a marathon, not a sprint. We will celebrate Diwali next Friday with some Indian food and lots of candle-light, but I will secretly be wishing for the holiday to be over so business can start up again in Kolkata and Delhi.

I keep reminding myself that we waited 13 months for Anya Rashi . . . and that turned out pretty well!

This week will be a good one for getting my mind off of the list. We have to start building an operational volcano for Aaron's homework (yikes!), and we need to do some Halloween costume construction. Last time I checked, the boys were going to be a pirate and a knight -- but Anya Rashi was still deciding between a princess, a fairy, a butterfly, a mermaid, a lion, a doctor, or cheese.

That's right, cheese. :o)

I'm a real girl!

At the library last week, we found a fun picture book related to adoption. In The Best Family in the World by Susana Lopez, a girl named Carlota finds out that a family will be adopting her. She fantasizes about her family being astronauts, tiger tamers, pastry chefs . . . and discovers that although they're regular people, elements of her fantasies are part of her new life. For instance, they may not work with tigers in the circus, but her new Grandma has two cats. I thought it was a great way to address the fantasies adopted children sometimes have about their birthparents, while appreciating what their adoptive families actually are like.

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The title of this post refers to something I want to remember when the kids are older. Nathan often tells Anya Rashi "You're so cute!" Lately, she has started to object to being called "cute." Their conversation usually goes like this:

Nathan: "You're so cute!"

Anya Rashi: (fiercely) "I'm not cute! I'm a real girl!!"

After a moment:

Anya Rashi: "You can call me wonderful."

When we were driving and noticing all the spectacular fall colors, Anya Rashi said, "When I see those leaves, it's like God is hugging my eyes."

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Much to the future embarrassment of my children, I am not above dumpster-diving. In our city, there's a kind of tradition that if you're getting rid of something usable, you leave it on the curb a day before garbage pick-up with a sign that says "free." Most often, someone will make it disappear, saving it from the landfill. Also, on the week when there is pick-up for bigger items, your stash on the curb is fair game for anyone who can make use of it.

Last week, we were on the way home from Aaron's boychoir rehearsal when something on the curb caught my eye. After many times on the "giving" end, it was my turn to be on the receiving end! I spied a nightstand that looked interesting . . . it definitely needed some TLC, but looked sturdy and well-made.

Anya Rashi and I took advantage of a warm day and sanded, washed and cleaned it, then put on a first coat of white paint, leftover from when I painted the kids' rooms. I'm not sure where it's going to go in our house -- one of the kids' rooms, possibly . . . But it is a nice, solid piece of free furniture! I'll have to post an "after" picture when we're done.

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We went to a state park two weekends ago to enjoy some of our last fine autumn days. The kids love that park, because there's a huge lake, an observation tower, a statue of a Native American chief, and lots of hiking trails (not to mention some impromptu rock climbing walls!). We have to soak up every last drop of good weather before winter comes . . . and it definitely helps me to stay busy with family things while we wait for our referral.

A timely gift

The scarf in the background is one that I found during our trip to bring home Anya Rashi.

Well, we are officially in October. Although I absolutely love autumn, I haven't been looking forward to it this year. This is the month when we can expect nothing to happen with our adoption, due to the Hindu holidays Diwali and Durga Puja.

In general, I've been handling the wait pretty well, but my friend Laurie totally undid me this morning. She brought a birthday gift to church this morning for me, and when I opened it I just started to cry. The photo doesn't do it justice, but the pendant shows a family of two parents with four children -- a little reminder of what our family will look like, hopefully sometime in 2011.

What a thoughtful friend -- and a truly beautiful reminder to keep my eyes on the finish line of this long journey that began in March of 2009. I treasure this gift even more because Laurie herself was adopted when she was an infant, and has been so supportive as we wait. She is a gem!

I also want to say thank you to everyone who left a comment about my last post. I was feeling the love from all of you who have been there (or are currently in the poopy-training trenches with me!). I was so happy to read them that Peter shook his head and said, "Only a mother would be this excited to read comments about poop." And he's right!