Thursday, May 17, 2012


The past two weeks have been punctuated by some painful events.  We feel like we are in the eye of a hurricane, as several families we know and love go through tragic losses.  Some friends at church -- amazing, wonderful people and parents -- lost a child this week.  She was just 15, with so much to give, and so much life ahead of her.  Our hearts are so broken for them as they go on parenting their other children, and grieving for their daughter.

Another dear friend's marriage is ending despite all her best efforts, and she must now be apart from her baby half of the time.  Another family close to us is coming to grips with the reality that their child has a mental illness.  And others we know are bearing the burden of infertility and an excruciatingly long path to parenthood. 

Amidst all this came Mother's Day.  As always, I have spent a lot of time thinking of Anya Rashi's birth parents, and wonder what their circumstances are now, five years after her birth.  In many ways, their situation seems no less tragic than our friends' situations. 

We don't have much information about them (and we don't feel it's our place to share what we do know about their circumstances -- that's Anya Rashi's story to tell someday, if she chooses), but I am struck by the sadness of  any of the possible reasons for relinquishing their child.  For many children placed in orphanages in her birth country, the main reasons are the birth parents' poverty or the stigma of unwed parenthood -- or sometimes, the bias against girl children.  Sometimes I feel completely inadequate to explain any of this to her as she grows up.  I feel like I can only be present with her while she asks those questions, and offer the only certainty I have found:  that our God is a God of redemption, who can weave something beautiful of even the most profound sadness.

I've been holding on to that truth this week, and finding comfort here:

Isaiah 53:4
Surely he took on our burdens and carried our sorrows . . .

Psalm 34:18
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.



No Greater Love said...

Oh, heartbreaking. I am so sorry for your friends' losses. I literally can't even imagine.

Blah...I just wrote so much and deleted it.

Honestly, words don't suffice.

I will be praying that the God of comfort will be so very present in your life and the lives of your friends.

Julie & Patrick said...

So sorry to hear that so many close to you are going through such difficult times. A good reminder that although we all endure hardships everyone can show a bit more compassion for others. Praying for comfort.


Sarah said...

I am so very sorry. Praying that the only One who can truly comfort would bring His peace to your friends.

Missy at Its Almost Naptime said...

We're in the same boat Nancy. So many friends hurting right now it is overwhelming. A couple of divorces - and a friend who had a stillbirth in December just miscarried.

Ready for Jesus to come :(